National Lampoon’s staycation
by Jennifer Cohron
Nov 13, 2011 | 2079 views | 0 0 comments | 15 15 recommendations | email to a friend | print
Jennifer Cohron
Jennifer Cohron
I had grand plans for my last week of vacation this year.

Zac and I were going to spend four glorious days and three romantic nights in a cabin high above Gatlinburg.

I envisioned us watching the sun rise over the multi-colored tree tops, playing pool for bragging rights, relaxing in the hot tub and snuggling by the fire place. I didn’t care if we ever made it into the city.

That vacation was going to recharge our batteries and make us forget all about our troubles.

Unfortunately, it was too high a price to pay for peace of mind. I couldn’t spend that kind of money in good conscience when it came time to make the reservations.

Plan B was a day trip to Graceland. I’m not a huge Elvis fan, but I figured paying respects at his mansion is one of those things every good Southerner should do before we die.

Then I found out the cost of admission. If Zac and I were going to fork over $70, I expected a guided tour by Elvis himself and maybe a little sing-along in the living room.

So that’s how the first week of November became the Cohron family’s first staycation.

We kicked it off with Halloween. Wyatt was Scooby Doo and Zac was his best pal Shaggy. He even shaved all of his beard except some chin hair so he would truly look the part.

As a line from one of the new Scooby Doo movies goes, the boys were “two trippy peas in a far-out pod.”

Zac wanted me to be Velma, but I couldn’t spend the time or money to get that costume together.

I ended up tagging along as a crazed Cubs fan. All I needed was the jersey Zac wore to our wedding and my awesome new furry Cubs hat.

Although Wyatt didn’t have enough teeth to enjoy his first Halloween last year, I expected that he might make himself sick on candy now. He inherited a chocoholic gene from his mother and grandpa.

To my surprise, the only thing he cared about was Dum Dums.

He earned a nice stash of other goodies for Zac and I to split, though. Wyatt had not one, not two but three plastic pumpkins stuffed with candy by the end of the day.

I guess that’s to be expected when you’re the only grandbaby in the family.

The next day we took a trip to the doctor for Wyatt’s 18 month check-up. As always, Dr. Hyland said that Wyatt was so healthy that he couldn’t find a reason not to give him a couple of vaccines.

Hyland certainly doesn’t win himself any brownie points with Wyatt by ordering all of those shots. However, the baby did give the doc a high five when the check-up was over.

On Wednesday, we decided to do a little Christmas shopping at the Galleria. The main item on our list was baby’s first Build A Bear.

Apparently Wyatt is still a little young to understand the coolness of that particular activity because he did everything except build a bear while we were there.

I had to pick out, stuff and dress the animal we lovingly named Chocolate Puppy while my son ran around and flirted with the nice lady in charge of bears.

Thursday was a day of rest for us. Zac and I spent most of the afternoon watching “Gone With The Wind” because we were going to Gadsden on Friday for an exhibit dedicated to the book and film.

If you ask Zac, he will say that I forced him to watch “Gone With The Wind.” I told him that he should consider himself privileged to be viewing this film classic.

He didn’t buy it and claimed to hate the movie, especially the ending. Like any mature adult, I responded to his criticism by bashing “Lord of the Rings.”

Needless to say, things got ugly. The exhibit was fantastic. I won’t say too much about it now because I am planning a Lifestyle feature on it in the near future.

Out of respect for my husband, I also will not mention the dark day that was Saturday, Nov. 5.

Thanks for ruining the end of our staycation, Saban.